Profiles Part 2 – How To Be Better Than Most
OK so in part 1 I gave some quick tips on what to put in your profile. Here are some bonus things that I have learnt over the past 2 years
The ladies will see a LOT of profiles and messages. They will make decisions in *seconds* of seeing your profile or message. They have to make fast assessments because of the flood of contact that they get – its a survival thing. You do need to survive the cull… oh course if you are a wham bam guy, well no amount of profile is going to get you head in the long term.
In point form they are
- Show that you make an effort
- Engage your reader
- Make it descriptive
- Be Open
Show that you make an effort
While I support the theory that you can not please everyone and thus you should not try to please everyone, the fairly standard “Hi I’m Barry, I like 4WDs and fishing. Call me” is not going to cut it. Way too many guys do this. I did when I started, it didn’t get me far. Expand your profile. Show the buyer that you are making an effort.
If you were selling a house, you would mow the lawn right. I am not advocating whipping your razor out but do most definitely make an effort.
I spoke to one lady who put it like this
“If he cant put any effort in his profile, he ain’t going to put any effort into me” *disgruntled face* with a hint of “Wham, Bam, Thank you Maam”
First impressions count big time. That could be meeting someone in a club or a pub, in the office. A dating site message or a profile view is no different.
Engage Your Reader
You are not fucking a hole, you are fucking a person. Engage the person first. Got that clear in your head?
Longer profiles engage the lady more. A couple of reasons
- A well written, descriptive profile shows that you are making an effort. See above
- Draw them into your mind. Drown them in your words…don’t just get their toes wet in a thin puddle – there are many thin profiles/profiles out there.
- Longer profiles are more memorable. If your profile takes 10 times to read as a short profile then your profile has more chance of being remembered. Those other 10 are just blips on the radar.
- People will remember key words in your profile. Think about this. You might read a ladies profile which goes into some detail. It might contain the words “blue dress”. Later you might see something blue or a dress or something that makes you think of those things and pow you remember her profile.
Use that kind of mental imagery to your advantage. A picture is worth a thousand words (pdf)
Make it a descriptive profile
- Endorphin and adrenaline are a great memory aid. The reader is already a bit keyed up so give them something to remember. Bear in mind that there is plenty of eye candy so eye candy is not going to stand out. Use your words and give them some written candy….just not over the top. “I am going to bend you over and rape you on the couch” is probably a bit much…. and that’s from me, a guy not known for his restraint.
- In a pub or club or social event, you can engage some one face to face right. Your speech, body language, your smiles, and laughter all come through.
Here you don’t have that. You have to get *you* across in the written form.
- People want some one like themselves. Its true… maybe different experiences but the same psychological makeup. Help them identify their matches. Its been said in business that if you make it easy for people to give you money, then they will. Its true here as well. Make it easy for them, and you will get quality customers.
Don’t be afraid to
- Say what you want – I like bananas
- Say what you don’t want – I like bananas but I don’t like apples.
Very few people say this *hint* hint*…the more experienced people do though. Weeds out the crud before contacting them or they contact you.
- Whats off limits
- What interests you, what turns you on.
- How you can turn them on. Presumably you have a brain. Use it. Be descriptive…read things, get ideas etc but get it out there where the ladies can read it.
Indeed actively go out and state up front what you are seeking. Spend less time talking to people that offer what u don’t want, and let them do the filtering – this is a great time saver. You may get disappointed at the lack of emails/attention but its worth it for the lack of time wasting. Any hole is not a goal.
Always back up your claims, and make those claims believable. Saying ” I will make u cum 100 times babe” is probably not going to be accepted as the truth or even entertained (read “next profile”
Might be an idea to express goals/philosophies, not promises.
Part 3 – Collected Profile Thoughts